Movie Dates

The typical (or shall I say stereotypical) date is dinner and a movie. The dinner part is easy. Sure there are different types of food, but avoid fast food and you'll be fine What movie to go see is a little more complicated. There are so many different genres to choose from. What is a person to do?

1. The Horror Movie
The first date classic. It makes the girl cling onto you because she's scared, right? Maybe. During one Halloween horror movie marathon, a friend of mine used every opportunity possible to leap into the lap of the guy she liked. Nothing became of this other than the continued mocking of my friend. On the other hand, at a more recent horror movie marathon, two friends of mine held onto each other the entire time. A couple of days late, after they mutually, publicly Facebook stalked each other they were officially dating. If it's mutually holding onto each other, it will be a success. If it's one sided, are you sure that you're on a date?

2. The Romantic Comedy
Romantic comedies (especially those that come out around Valentine's Day) are specifically designed to have a simple plot. This is so couples can pay ten bucks a piece to sit in a darkened public place and make out, while not being horribly confused when they come up for air. (Why else would there be movies like This Means War?) These are only for couples comfortable with sucking face in public. If you aren't a couple comfortable making out in public it's best to either 1) wait for the DVD and rent it or 2) go with friends and shoot spit balls at couples making out.

3. The Science Fiction Film
If it's one that people camped out for, you better be dating a nerd if you plan to go see it on a date. If you are dating a nerd and you are a nerd, the only problem will be the debates afterwards. These will include Comic book/Book/Video game/Board game (yeah, I'm talking to you Battleship) compared to the movie, how it compares to other science fiction films (most likely Star Wars), what the deeper meanings were, etc.

4. Twilight Saga
To anyone who was forced to go see any Twilight film on a date, you have my deepest sympathies. This is a series of films that mostly just screaming fan girls drooling over Edward and Jacob go see. Unfortunately, these drooling fan girls, on occasion have boyfriends (and on rarer occasions girlfriends) who are either drugged, tied up, kidnapped, or bribed into seeing these films. Once again, to those forced to see these films, you have my sincerest condolences.

5. The Fantasy Film
It's the same basic situation as science fiction films.

6. The Musical
These are the movies that drama nerds go see on dates (or Tim Burton fans in the case of Sweeney Todd). After the movie, they will then go buy the soundtrack and will know all the lyrics by the time the date has ended. In some cases, the people going will already know all the lyrics to the Broadway version and will be using all their effort to not sing along to with the movie.

7. The Animated Musical
Dorks and boyfriends/girlfriends of dorks will go see these on dates. They will  actually watch the film because all around them will be little children and the parents of little children. If they attempt to make out then it will take only a couple minutes for parents to make disgruntled throat clearing noises as well as stares that appear to be an attempt at blowing up the couple in question. After the movie they will then do as drama kids do; purchase the soundtrack and learn the songs by the time the night is over.

8. The Anime Film
Who are we kidding? No one who goes to see these in theaters is on a date. They were probably just kicked out of the house for a bit because they were watching to many cartoons alone in their room.